...and in his right hand he held a golden trumpet...

The man asked me to help him find the perfect book for his 7 year old, who he described as an "advanced reader". So I did what any good bookseller would do at that description - showed him to the leveled readers (pre-chapter books) for 5-8 years old.

"Well no that's a little much for him, he really doesn't read at that level quite yet. He only really reads Where's Waldo and I Spy books. Do you have any of those?"

It was all I could do not to respond: "So you're saying he isn't an advanced reader. He isn't, in fact, even a reader".