...don't phunk with my heart...

My heart is devastated. Reading my horoscope today, I thought it might be fun to read what Phil Booth wrote for some of the other signs.

In two of the other sign's messages I found entries that were WORD-FOR-WORD what he had in previous times written for Cancer! Is he just recycling the same ambiguous crap for everyone?!? I RELY on him. Fucking hell.

Alright children, auditions are on. Find me another astrologer, if you please. With the proper credentials and a proven history! I want someone very well recommended, this is crucial to the way I conduct my life.

(And I don't want to hear the obvious replies of "maybe you should find another way in which to conduct your life").