...you'll be working with a Mountie who's got a wolf that's a florist...

A small bit of Monday humour, in honour of the RCMP's¹ newest initiate²:

"A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership and past the Tim Horton's.

Taking off down the Trans Canada, he floored it to 120 kph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left. "Amazing!" he thought as he flew down the 401, pushing the pedal to the metal even more. Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw the RCMP behind him, red and blue lights flashing and siren blaring.

"I can get away from him - no problem!" thought the elderly nut case as he floored it to 130 kph, then 140, then 150 kph. Suddenly, he thought, "What on earth am I doing? I'm too old for this nonsense!", pulled over to the side of the road and waited for the Mountie to catch up with him.

Pulling in behind him, the officer walked up to the driver's side of the

Corvette, looked at his watch and said, "Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes. Today is Friday. If you can give me a reason why you were speeding that I've never heard before, I'll let you go."

The man, looking very seriously at the Mountie, said, "Years ago, my wife ran off with an RCMP officer.

I thought you were bringing her back.

"Have a good day, Sir," said the Mountie."

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I'm making light, but inside I am devastated. There is no way of sugar coating this, it is just... the pits. I was just absolutely floored today when I heard this, and not just because I assumed there would be some kind of height restriction (jokes! just jokes!). Aw man.

1. Canada's special police. They have horses, and funny hats. Apparently, they have to move to Alberta.
2. Someone too smart for the company, hence the more-or-less lack of surprise that he's moving on.